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Mine was a family of four girls, each born 2 years apart, give or take a few months here and there. I was the oldest. By the time my youngest sister was born, both parents were raging, non-functional alcoholics. That youngest sister grew up to tell me she considered me her parent. I was six... Read More

“Many there be that have run out of their wits for women.” King James Translation of the Book of Ezra originally written about 460, B.C.  “Poor Tom hath been scared out of his good wits.” William Shakespeare in King Lear, 1606  “During the whole of this time Scrooge had acted like a man out of his... Read More

The artist, James Turrell, is a resident of Arizona. Somewhere just northeast of me here in Flagstaff, he is turning an ancient cinder cone, Roden Crater, into a new, immersive art experience. I can’t wait to see it. At the Scottsdale Museum of Contemporary Art (SMoCA) his piece, Knight Rise, is ready for you and... Read More

This is a follow up to last month’s blog about kids who spend lots of time in their heads chewing on all the awful things that have happened to them in their short lives. We concluded with recognizing the value of writing or talking about the painful stuff but thinking about all the sensory details... Read More

If you watched the Super Bowl, you may have seen that great ad that had these giant rabbits dragging people down huge holes. Very catchy but I have no idea what it was advertising. But I do love a good rabbit hole… I started out thinking I’d write about the confusing subject of cutting, or... Read More

(5-minute read) I’ve gotten hooked on a TV show on the History Channel: Alone. I enjoy several things about it. The variety of skill sets brought to the situation by the group of contestants is truly impressive. Some approach the experience with great shows of bravado and entitlement, others come with humility and wonder. The... Read More

“The path of least resistance is the path of the loser.” H. G. Wells Put more gently: The path of least resistance is rarely the path of wisdom. “The path of least resistance leads to crooked rivers and crooked men.” Henry David Thoreau I remember getting new carpet once and noticing how fluffy the pile was... Read More

What are the unique pitfalls and blessings of committing to Fost-Adopt status? Is it right for you? Since I consider it the most complicated of the three options (Adoptive Parenting, Foster Parenting, and Fost-Adopt Parenting) I’d like to focus on that today. Before we jump into this, let’s visit the concept of Concurrent Planning which... Read More

I got my hat handed to me last week when I mentioned the importance of SELF CARE. Someone who has repeatedly impressed me with their understanding and commitment to kids from hard places spoke up and said, basically, “When I hear that term, I immediately feel like a failure. Call it Maintenance and it doesn’t... Read More

I cleaned out a storage unit recently. When I closed my house in Phoenix and built my little cottage in Flagstaff, I had to downsize in a big way. I let the furniture go when I finally accepted that it wasn’t smart to be paying to store it, but it took another 5 years to... Read More